Mountain snow, the kind that blankets your world, has a way of covering up the imperfections of the world. The dirty road, gone. The presents left by local dogs, gone. The sound of cars on the highway, gone. Everything is for a moment, pure. Nothing is wrong, nothing is broken, nothing left to do, but walk in its beauty and soak it in. Soak in nature, and the not so distant sound of avalanche control, and be grateful for being here, at this moment, to experience something that will never happen again.
But then you remember, what’s underneath, what’s been covered up, and in that moment when you are feeling both the beauty and the beast, the pain and the passion, the joy and the heartache, that is when you are living. That is when you are touching your authentic self. The piece of you that yearns to be released but is too often covered up in the name of being happy.
I no longer believe we are all waking up each day, looking to find happiness. Rather, I think we want contentment. For me, that feeling of peace and tranquility, of everything being, as it is, as it already is, is where it’s at. It’s not always happiness, but that was never promised to me, despite my belief that is was.
So now, as I wake to a gorgeous day with the promise of good things to come, spent with loving family and friends, I embrace also the constant feeling of loss and emptiness, to create my life. Me Being Ken, uniquely me, with my struggles, my pain, and my blessings, all mixed together. Trying to embrace and experience every moment for what it is, whatever it is, and always remembering what is under, my mountain snow.